Top Ways You Know You Own Parrots:
A bird flies at your face, and you don’t flinch. With perfect timing and no alarm at all, you put up a hand for her to land on.
You know you’re a bird owner when said bird slaps you in the face with her wings as she ignores your perfectly timed hand and crash lands on a shoulder instead.
You know you’re a parrotlet owner when you go into a pet shop and think, ‘Wow, that’s a big budgie.’
You’re a bird owner when the first thing you do when you wake up is feed the birds (even before the humans).
When furious calls of ‘PEEKABOO’ are the thing to rouse you from bed every day.
When you’re mind-controlled into feeding your avian your own meal – even though they have a plate of the same thing twelve inches away.
When you spend more money on bird toys and accessories than on things for yourself.
When you let your cockatiel shout into your ear because you’re a musician, and hell, it could be the most acoustically sound place in the room – you’ve certainly never tested.
When you can pick your parrotlet up and throw him like a boomerang – and he always comes back for more.
When you think of all the birds you wish you could own and then remember you’re a musician.
When you’re outside and a pigeon flies at you – and you instinctively put up a hand before you realise you probably don’t want to do that.
When you’re a university student and you actually own a handheld vacuum.
Coincidentally, the handheld vac is only ever used to hoover up the bottom of bird cages.
When it’s the middle of the moult season, and everything you own is covered in feathers, no matter how often you try to sweep them.
When you pick out the flight feathers because they’re prettiest.
When you wonder what you’re going to do with a load of flight feathers, anyway, and then end up rearranging them in the order they should go…
You know you’re a bird owner when you have a bird blog to document all this stuff.